every single night,
i look out my windowsill,
and look to the stars,
at night,
i look at them and study them to,
i try to find a shooting star,
so i could wish upon that falling star,
i normallly dont believe in wishes,
nor magic or spells
but with this situation,
ill be willing to try anything,
and tempted to try techniques,
i know its impossible,
but somehow i feel,
that its not to late or over with,
not yet any way,
I ask the star so bright in the sky, to bring her back to me,
so i can see her once more,
to look her in the eye,
the eye of understangin and ALways there for me while at the same time not sseing each other there for far some time, and ill say i love you,
and I NEED YOU,
to say those words would mean engraving them
so far and so deep in her heart,
and so far and deep inside of me,
where my most precious and deep thought moments lie. that place my heart,
slowly inside she is dying,
slowly but surely,
its happeing,
and i know i cant do nothiing to stop it,
and i know its gonna happen,
whether i want it to,
my worst fear of losing her,
is coming true,
i want her back in my arms,
to hold her for one last time,
i want her to hug me in her arms,
they way she always held me when i was a lil shit, and a little pain in the ass,
i want her to say how im beautiful,
and that she cherishes me,
always and forever,
but since shes not here with me,
her name will be engraved in the grave yard inside of me,
that i built for her,
with her name in the cneter of my heart,
they keep us apart,
even though were mother and daughter,
thye keep us apart,
they dont understand the bond,
dont understand the love,
they keep me away from her,
and shove her away further and further away,
they tell me shes bad,
that i will turn out like her,
but they dont knwo they way i know her,
i know she would chose the bottle over me,
than to stick with me,
and deal with her problems,
she chugs another sip,
and gulps another bottle,
until all thats left of her,
is sleep,
alcohol has become of her,
she doesnt know how to escape it,
i love her dearly,
and my fear of me losing her,
has finally come true,
im just coping with days,
and blocking out the years,
and the months and the days and the time
taht passes by between us, and i dont get to see her and knowing that she has two severe sicknesses. it makes me ill thinking,
about losing the one women,
in my life thats like a jewel,
thats really beautiful,
and that i treasure with all my heart.
i dont know what ill do without my mom,
shes been in my life far to long, by far not to long, and been there and stuck up with alot of unnessacarily stuff,
i miss you mom,
and the fear of losng you makes me sad,
i know you have a sickenss two of them,
one of these days youll be gone.
until that day comes ill be living my life to the fullest. TE AMO MIJA/MADRAE. ESTAS BONITA...Joni Dale 
| Friend | Comment |
|---|---|
|
____________~shORty VCL x3~_____________ |
| Friend | Comment |
|---|---|
|
this is about my mom,, who has cancer and psorisis of the lungs from drinking to much. She has drunk from the time i was born, and yet it has caughten up to her, she is 30 years old, to young to go. I love her with all my heart and pray to god to make me a stronger person from when she goes. i know i will grieve great. But im not that strong. Wehn i say were not together shes over in utah and i see her rarely. Poeple talk alot of shit about her and yet she still comes out on the top. She doenst know how to coop with her problmes and takes it out on the bottle, and with every sip she takes. They say bad things about her and say they dont like her, then if they dont like her they should stop being fucking two faced bitchies and tell her straight up instead of in front of her acting liek they love her. they hate her and are jealous of me>> my question why though? is it simply because my mother is beautiful and absouluty gorgeous that all her kids are that way?? or is simply becasue my mom has somthieng that thye want all so much.. me.. all throughout my life my mom and dad fought over me.. for as long as i can remember.. *Mami~Mira* |
_______________ 
_______________ O:) .
